Friday, January 20, 2012

Head is spinning.

Sorry for my lack of posts. It's difficult to blog when things are not going well. But with this blog's aim at trying to document the "reality" of newbie social working, I'm trying to remember to blog through the good and the bad.

Lately, it's been bad. So be prepared for some venting. Or wailing.

I'm feeling sooooo overwhelmed. And confused.

You see, when you're sitting there in class or in trainings, it's energizing. You want to run out as soon as you can and start "helping." Then when you do, when you're sitting in a tiny apartment with a stressed out mother and her children who are bouncing off the walls from boredom, it's very easy to feel...at  loss. And it does not help that my agency does not run with a "program" for me to fall back on during these times.

Some days I feel hopeful. Then other days, I feel hopeless. I often am left thinking "Did I make a difference? What am I doing? What am I trying to do?" In this field where the outcomes are not as concrete or visual, it's very difficult to gauge your work.

And at the moment, I can't see it :(

Until our next visit,
New BSW